April 2023
It was a very unearthly hour of the morning and in my groggy sleepiness I heard someone poking around the kitchen. I thought it was Bob as he and Shujin were leaving early, so I assumed Bob might be finding some breakfast. But as I lay there half asleep I realised that Okasan was also in the kitchen, and there was some plastic bags rustling (nearly every fruit and vegetable in Japan is pre-packaged). Then I heard Okasan speaking with Masato, not Bob. Suddenly, I was wide awake. I jumped out of bed and, in urgency, told them, “It's not our turn to make curry for church! We're bringing the rice, not curry!!” Peel carrots and potatoes sat on the kitchen bench beside the chopping board and knife.
The regular rice and curry for church lunches was starting to wear very thin on me! There was a roster, and we all take our turn making the curry or rice, but this commitment was just going too far!
It was all started because the church was feeling left out. They looked upon our family going off to have lunch after church with aunty and uncle, and they were jealous. The idea never came to them that they too, could meet up with others and have lunch together! We weren’t exclusive. It wasn’t unusual for others outside our family to be invited and join us. But somehow, it seemed the rest of this small church had FOMO (fear of missing out). They didn’t want to miss out! Pre-covid there was regular lunches at church where everyone brought food to share. But covid ruined that. And now, coming out of covid, somehow, it seemed safer for one person to make curry for everyone, rather than for everyone to make food to share… I don’t really understand that logic…! Anyway, so it was arranged that the church would do rice and curry for lunch each week. And here Masato and Okasan were overly committed, in the kitchen at this early hour, taking their turn at cooking. Or at least, they thought it was their turn!
We had a brief conversation and I was informed that Aunty asked Masato to cook curry, so whom was I to argue? I went back to bed. It was twilight and I knew it would be hard to fall asleep. I turned on my phone so I could play an audio book and try fall back asleep and make use of what might be left of the night. When my phone woke up, it greeted me with the time: 4:38am. 4:38AM!!!
Shuji mumbled to me, “What time is it?”
“4:38am,” I moaned.
“Oh what?!”
He was out of bed, talking with his mum in a very unimpressed tone. There was a brief conversation, Shujin pulled up the roster on his phone, showing that Masato was on next week, NOT today!
He flopped back into bed. Okasan gently closed our shoji door (which is literally paper) as though to block out the light and sound as she and Masato neatened up the kitchen. Well, thanks for the consideration now!! It wasn’t closed for long before I heard it slide open. Bob walked into our room, drowsy and complaining that the light woke him up. Shujin, spoke to him and sent him back to bed. I lay in bed, half asleep, listening to my audible book, drifting in and out of sleep until 7am when I knew I needed to get up.
I really felt for Shujin. Both cooks were unable to work today, so the responsibility fell on him. There would be no sleeping in for him. After getting woken up so early, he now had to cook breakfast for the residents, then he had to preach the sermon at church and then cook for the 2pm lunch for the residents. He'll be soooooo exhausted!!
I stumbled into the bathroom and washed my face with cold water to try feel more awake. So much frustration and annoyance was swirling inside me. Anger brewed in my belly as my mind played over the events. It wouldn’t be so bad, except this has happened before. Last time Okasan was on for making curry, Masato stressed her out the night before asking if she had everything ready to make the curry in the morning (after I had gone to bed, otherwise I could have told them I'm all over it!) and they got up before 6am to start cooking it! I was so annoyed! Shujin and Bob had been away, so Missy had slept with me, and I'd had a bad night sleep with Missy sharing my bed and I couldn't even sleep in!! We're in such a small house and the kitchen in this house-built-for-two is in the centre. There’s no way to not disturb everyone. I was so annoyed because it doesn't take four hours to make Japanese curry! I'd planned to do it after breakfast!
And now, this morning, I wasn’t expecting them to be cooking curry so I hadn’t requested it be done when everyone was awake. I had been caught off guard and that also bugged me! As I was in the bathroom with all this going on in my head, I heard the deep, American voice of Joyce Myers speak, "People waste so much time being angry at others.”
God was clearly preparing me for this moment, as a dear friend had recently shared a YouTube video with me; a sermon by Joyce Myers, about mindset. The words replayed in my head:
"People waste so much time being angry at others.”
Yep. OK, thank you, God, I got the message.
I took the reminder and I felt so much better inside me! No hard feelings were stored up, instead everything disappeared. It felt so nice not having to feel angry at Masato or Okasan when they woke up! But I will certainly be requesting that next week's curry NOT get cooked before breakfast!